Expectations

 There's nothing so weighty as expectations. 

"Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law."

Romans 13:8

Time

Some things, if I'm going to do them at all, just take time. Like a really good scone.

The Unremarkable Day

I love this story. Sometimes I forget it happened, and then when I remember it I am touched with joy all over again. I'll try to relate it as faithfully as I can.

Several years ago a good friend came to visit for a few days. While he was at my house one day, he noticed a home improvement project that he wanted to work on. So I happily agreed. He got on the internet and found the best place to get the materials. It was a good distance from here but the savings and availability were worth it. So we jumped in my truck and took off.

After loading up with everything we needed at the hardware store, we returned to my house and started in. We soon discovered we had bought the wrong adhesive. There were several tubes involved. So we decided to take them back to the store and exchange them for the right ones.

This made for another  long-ish trip. But we were kind of in vacation mode. You know how it is when you are working on a home improvement project and you're still living a normal life? So everything still needs to keep going on while your home is torn up. Every little thing that doesn't go quite right has a potential to be very frustrating. That is not the way it was. We were good friends and comfortable together and enjoying everything we did together. So even driving to the store to exchange the adhesive was fun. There was no time table. This wasn't interrupting our day, this WAS our day.

I even remember mentioning, "There must be some reason we need to go back to that store. " I didn't have any particular spiritual insight, it's just the kind of thing that people say in that situation.

At the store we quickly found the right adhesive and I headed to the checkout to make the exchange. My friend made a stop at the men's room.

I chose a checkout with a young man at the register,  maybe in his late teens or early twenties. I had my adhesives and receipts and I plunked them down on the counter. He began to process the exchange, and I asked him "How are you doing today?" Without looking up, he said "Not very good. My dad died a short time ago, my brother is very sick and disabled and living at home with my mom and me, and my mother is struggling with serious depression. And my girlfriend just broke up with me today."

I stood there for a moment,  frozen in shock. There again, my question had been one of those things that we just say without expecting a real answer. And he had replied without hesitation and almost calmly. I think I said something like, "Oh my goodness."

Just then my friend showed up.  I introduced him to the young checker and then I said "This young man isn't having a very good day." He and my friend talked for a little bit and then my friend asked him a question that it never occurred to me to ask. He said to the young man, "Are you a believer?" Meaning a believer inJesus Christ. This stunned me a little bit, because it wasn't a question I had in my mind at all. But I paid attention, and I remembered that.

The young man said "Yes. Well, I used to be. I'm not so sure anymore." I confess that I don't remember the rest of the conversation they had. I felt like I was in a little bubble of holy joy. I do remember my friend asking the young man his name, and he said his name was Joshua. Then my friend said, "Your father named you well. Joshua was a brave man of God."

After they finished talking, my friend suggested that we pray together. So right there at the checkout we all bowed our heads and he prayed for Joshua. When we lifted our heads and Joshua opened his eyes they were clear and bright. He looked at us as if he just realized we were there. And he said, "Don't I know you? Have you been here before?" My friend and I both said no. I explained that I lived too far away to ever shop there. My friend explained that he was from out of state. Joshua  said, "I feel like I know you. There's something so familiar about you." Who was Joshua seeing? I like to think that who he saw was Jesus in us. "To them God willed to make known what are the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles: which is Christ in you, the hope of glory."  Colossians 1:27

We chatted briefly, said our goodbyes and headed out of the store with our adhesive. As I thought back on it, I realized the whole time that we were there no one interrupted us. No customers came to stand in line behind us, no supervisor came over to find out what was going on. It was as if we were all alone in the store. I don't even remember seeing another person that whole time.

This remarkable day still stands out in my memory. So why have I entitled this story The Unremarkable Day? I somehow feel that days like this ought not to be remarkable. It ought to be the normal thing for me to do as I go about the community and in other ways that I have the opportunity to interact with people. I want to be more like my friend, sensing  the Holy Spirit's prompting, being available for His use. God always makes time for people, He always makes a way. Our time with Joshua was not wasted. We still got back, we still finished the project, only with joyful hearts.

"...be ready always to give an answer to every man that asketh you a reason of the hope that is in you... " 1Peter 3:15

Since Jesus Came Into My Heart

If you've trusted Jesus as your Savior, do you remember what your life was like before Him? Have you thought of that lately? Or how about this... Have you thought about where you would be today without Him? 

My relationship with Jesus has been feeling a little flat lately. I know He hasn't changed, He hasn't moved away from me, yet I feel I want more closeness, as I felt in earlier days. And I don't know how to get back there. I know faith isn't always about feelings, but it IS a relationship. I guess if I could compare it to marriage, my feeling lately is we might have coffee together in the morning, a quick peck on the cheek and a wave good-bye, and then on to our separate ways with maybe a text or two during the day. Still married, yes. But lacking something.

When I opened my phone this morning, I saw this young man's message. And a quiet joy sprang alive inside me. Oh Jesus, thank You! Thank You that You called me 39 years ago. Thank You for all the people who witnessed to me and prayed for me along the way. Where would I be today without You?

Prayer

When I get up in the morning and jump into my day without spending time in prayer and fellowship with Jesus, it's as if I'm saying "I don't need God's help. I can handle this on my own."

What is a stronghold?

Have you ever read 2 Corinthians 10 and been puzzled by this passage?

"For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war after the flesh: (For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds;) Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;" verses 3-5

I would think, "What is a stronghold? Do I have strongholds? How do I recognize them in myself and others?" I mean, it's obviously not a good thing. 

So I looked up "strongholds" in the Bible Hub online Strongs Concordance. And this is what I found:

Here is a link to the page:

https://biblehub.com/greek/3794.htm

So... it's used figuratively in this verse to indicate a false argument in which a person seeks shelter to escape reality. 

Wow. Thats a big word that says much. I'm going to just ponder that for awhile. 

Washing Dishes

"If while washing dishes, we think only of the cup of tea that awaits us, thus hurrying to get the dishes out of the way as if they were a nuisance, then we are not “washing the dishes to wash the dishes.” What’s more, we are not alive during the time we are washing the dishes. In fact we are completely incapable of realizing the miracle of life while standing at the sink. If we can’t wash the dishes, the chances are we won’t be able to drink our tea either. While drinking the cup of tea, we will only be thinking of other things, barely aware of the cup in our hands. Thus we are sucked away into the future—and we are incapable of actually living one minute of life." ~Thich Nhat Hanh 

I'm going to be 70 years old next year. I spent most of my life working real hard and pushing real hard and still feeling like I wasn't doing enough. At the end of the day I would look at my to-do list and I would think about all the things that I had not finished, not giving much thought to all of those things that I  had finished. Many times I would be doing one thing and thinking ahead to the next task that had to be completed. Then I would move to the next task and think about the NEXT task in line to be completed. I was very much like the person in this quote, never really being present in whatever I was doing. My value rested in my accomplishments.

I'm starting to slow down now. I have vision difficulty which forces me to organize my work very methodically. The last few months I've started having some twinges in my wrists and arms and hands.. if it were not for these things I might not be considering a change. This doesn't come naturally for me. That would be too bad, because I have nothing to prove to anyone. I have a great deal of credibility in my accomplishments that are behind me. I can rest and know that I have given my best when I could most of the time. I'm learning to relax and enjoy the tasks I have before me each day, not necessarily needing to explain myself or at least trying not to feel like I need to.

I think I'm more pleasant company now also.

Sometimes I look out my kitchen window and feel a little guilty at all that I have not completed and comparing myself to my past self and other people. But then a little voice in my head says "You cannot do it all. You cannot do all that you think you need to do, or that you want to do."

It's kind of a relief. I'm learning to enjoy it. I'm not sure I could have learned it as a younger woman. I'm not sure I felt comfortable with what I had accomplished in my life. So I'm not going to encourage any of you to take on this same mindset. Just tuck it away and give it some thought. 

"To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:"

Ecclesiastes 3:1